I am Focused

I am continuing my way through my second round of Barre Blend.  Today was the end of week one. 

With this program there are affirmation cards that you can use to help inspire you, lift you up, and help us just talk nice to ourselves.  When was the last time you said something nice to the face in the mirror?

Inspired by my sister I am attempting to journal starting with the affirmation for the day.  Today was...

I am focused.  I devote my energy to what truly matters.

Wow!  I can literally say that after almost every one of these cards.  They are very insightful and will make me think.  I do find it strange saying, "I am..." when most often I literally am not what I'm saying I am.  I don't want to mislead anyone because I do not have it all together.  I fail daily...or maybe I should say I miss the mark daily.  I haven't failed yet because I have not given up, but my aim misses the bulls-eye.

There's a bigger meaning behind, "I" that I believe is missed nowadays, and the real meaning of words in general.  People just let anything fall out of their mouths, myself included.  An example I grapple with is, "I love this outfit!" or "I love pizza!"  Really?! I'm sorry, but I really don't "love" those things, I like them, but love...no. Or how we say, "Love you!" to whomever that maybe we don't truly mean that...?  Or maybe it's just me being flippant with my words.

A while ago I was about to say, "Love you!" in a message or post on social media, I can't remember which, and something stopped me.  I asked myself...would I be able to say to this person, "I love you?"  I, me, my mind, my body, my words, my time, my sweat, my tears...did "I" really love them like love is supposed to be?

I can honestly say that I can't love anyone truly the way love is supposed to be without Jesus, but in that moment I really had a hard time saying, "I love you."  Because I knew it really wasn't true.  Now, I did care of this person, but to put "I" in front of "love you." is a whole other story for me now.  Yes, I still say, "Love you!" to people, but when I do that I know I can put, "I", in front of it.

So, now I have these affirmations that say, "I AM" in front of every single one that are bugging me so let me interject a few more words, "I am trying to be focused."  I am trying to devote my energy to what truly matters on a daily basis.  I am trying to love people as they should be loved.  I am trying to raise my children the way they should be raised.  I am trying...

That's all anyone can really do right?  Try?

There's so much more this is though, how do I decide what truly matters?  What do I weigh my daily tasks against to see if they add up?

My faith has to take precedence.  Jesus first...do I do this daily?  That's a big fat NO, but that's exactly why I need Him.  I'm so lost without his guidance.  I think after my faith must be my goals.  Lining those us under Christ as well, and then looking at what I'm focused on during my day brings things into more focus.

I mean...if I have a goal to be intentional about moving my body every day then I better get up and get it done.  If I'm going to be able to get up and get it done I better go to bed and get good rest.

Everything I look at throughout each day for even a second can either hinder me or move me forward.

I'm obviously not very focused if I keep missing the mark daily, but at least I'm trying.  I'm practicing if you will.  The best athletes in the world don't get there by doing their sport when it's convenient or when they feel like it. They do it every day without fail, and even they have times of great success and times where they "fail" by the world's standards.

I try not to focus on the world's standard of how or what I should be.  It's so easy to get wrapped up in those webs, but I'm thankful for this reminder...The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.  Lamentations 3:22-23.

So where, by the end of the day, my focus has usually move on from what truly matters every morning is a new beginning to focus.  Or at least try to focus on what truly matters.



XO,
Shelon

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